The Lone Ranger (2013). I Don't Even Know...

Tonto and The Lone Ranger

What can best be described as one of the most direction-less films of the year, Gore Verbinski's wild west picture The Lone Ranger is (emotionally) confusing.

Gore Verbinski

Damned if I know what that above statement even means because I'm still recovering from the utter feelings of confusion that I was put through by said director. This is the genius behind Pirates of the Caribbean (only referring to the first one).

Notice that I have not filed this under the 'Reviews' category. That's because this isn't a review. Not by a long shot. This is a rant, a tirade about how a movie so ambitious film with such an epic opening could flop so badly during the second half. I'm mad.

Let's get this out of the way first because I'm a massive visual effects industry advocate: The visual effects are brilliant. As with any film of this hype nowadays. No problem there, Gore. You know can make bedazzling features.

As for everything else this movie has to offer, you'll be let down. If the mediocre dialogue doesn't put you off, the awkward instances of comedy that are heaped upon you will.

Is it really that bad? No. The Lone Ranger has its moments, all thanks to Johnny Depp. It's hard to imagine that anything could go wrong with a Johnny Depp movie. He is one of the best performers alive. That's a fact. I'm assuming it was Verbinski's presence behind the camera that attracted him to the project, coupled with Depp's history of playing weird characters on screen (he's good at it too!). But seriously Johnny, read the entire screenplay before taking on a character.

The lack of direction is overwhelming. From the first 10 minutes, one can easily determine how the movie will end as the premise is very cliché. You've got a bad guy, and a good guy who happens to also be 'the chosen one' - but he doesn't quite know that yet. That's where Tonto (Depp) comes in. He is, what I found to be, the facilitator between the two factions of good and evil. Kind of like Jack Sparrow. Actually, now that I think back, Johnny Depp played the exact same character in the Lone Ranger as he did in the Pirates series. Tonto is the only source of comedic relief in the film. Every now and then he feeds his bird who is so pleasantly latched onto his head piece. There is a spoiler to be made here.

To be frank, I don't know what to make of it. Quentin Tarantino listed The Lone Ranger as one of his favourite movies of 2013 and his reasoning is understandable because the film had potential to be better than it came out. He's a controversial filmmaker who's never afraid to touch a nerve through the silver screen. We've seen Tarantino explore slavery for what it is, in all it's brutality and injustice without sparing anything. This was because he genuinely wanted to bring this touchy subject out into the open for all to see, because it did happen and there's no denying it. The Lone Ranger, however, fictionalizes and bastardizes the slaughter of the aboriginals on which the very foundation of America was built.Yes, The Lone Ranger is an adaptation of popular fiction, but at least write the thing properly! Sheesh.